Friday, November 27, 2015

Getting larger or smaller?

As a someone who is a "Martha" by nature, I tend to measure my worth in what I do.  I can tell you I know this isn't healthy. I can tell you that is not how God sees me. I can also tell you that getting my "to do" list interrupted is a troublesome thing for me.

God and I we're working on this.  First he moved me to a country where I feel lonely; and a culture where things move at a much slower pace (this is good for me!).

When I looked at the word for today, I was baffled.  My world in many ways has gotten much smaller, not enlarged. We work with a people group that is marginalized but isn't necessarily "all around" me.  It is a people group that is in every corner of the world, yet largely remains unreached.

My husband had a job and many opportunities the minute he touched foreign soil. Me?  I still have to get my nursing licence in order to apply to volunteer. We are still unsure of how this will work with Nathanael's responsibilities and calling.

 I have enlarged my heart, for the people around me; for the opportunities that we would love to see happen.  I have enlarged the vision for what I would love to do with my responsibilities.

At the same time, the pace, the home responsibilities (which simply take longer in a developing country) are teaching me to try to live every moment with God.  Really the dependance on him is what is enlarging my heart..

for a country that is not my own
for a people who are different than me
for the climate that means you are constantly sweaty
for the alone time I get when I hang wash on the roof
for the fact that I have the privilege of being with my children all of the time..

Really largeness and smallness are relative, but I pray God would enlarge the places in my heart that need it; giving me the focus on the important things.

Velvet Ashes: encouragement for women serving overseas


  1. I love this: Really the dependance on him is what is enlarging my heart..

    The connection between dependance on our Father and our heart getting bigger for Him, for others, for His vision and purpose in our lives is so significant. May you be blessed and surrounded by His goodness and love for you!
    Thanks for linking up with Velvet Ashes!

  2. "Really the dependance on him is what is enlarging my heart" Oh such wisdom! I don't know why but your post brought to mind the beginning of the verse Psalm 18:19 "He brought me out into a spacious place"

  3. I really appreciate the way you are walking in step with our loving Father, accepting what He is giving you in this season of life and letting go of that which He isn't giving you right now. God bless you as you continue to pursue His heart and plans for you.